Tag Archives: winning

Life Interrupted

I passed the NY and NJ Bar Exams on my first attempt. I obtained a job as an Attorney. I received regular considerable raises, and I would have liked to work in this practice for the rest of my life.  I was on the firm’s letterhead.

My PTSD, trauma, anxiety, and depression progressed during the four years I worked for the same office. Eventually I would get panic attacks every day, calling my boyfriend during my breaks crying.

During this period, my psychiatrist tried several different medications in an attempt to regulate my increased anxiety, PTSD, trauma, and depression. We adjusted my medication no less than four times before we found a combination that made it possible for me to work approximately twelve hour days.

Nevertheless, I was still having panic attacks and when I was yelled at by people in the office, clients, or vendors, my anxiety, trauma, and PTSD were triggered. 

I was diagnosed with “c-diff” after getting tests back from my Gastroenterologist. I was then confined to my home because of the dangerous contagiousness of the disease.

I did not leave my apartment for 5 months. Look it up. It IS that contagious.

I started coloring and sending my coloring to friends.

I took pictures of everything.

A weed’s tiny flower juxtaposed with my apartment.

I worked incredibly hard for ten years to get to the place I wanted to be, only to be met with illnesses that would keep me from doing what I put so much time, money, and effort into. Becoming an Attorney was not an easy thing to accomplish, and I believed it would be my final career, which would have been a significant part of my life. 

But I’m still here.

For the win.